My self: It smells kind of like potato chips.

Christeen: It samells (not a mis-spelling) like Diarrhea.

Your breath smells like you pooped in it and ate it.

While driving home from Carrabbas (awesome) on a Friday night…my girlfriend and I were rocking our dance moves in the car at a red light to the endearing Prince Paul ballad Booty Clap. My girlfriend being sweet thinks the best about most things. She didn’t think that the song was actually saying what it was saying. When she realized this she immediately stops dancing and slumps in a disappointed fashion and says “Ohhhhh, this song is talking about a Booty Clap…disgusting…” It was hilarious, you had to be there.

(As cold shivers run their way down my spine)

Seriously…this kind of shit is why some dudes prefer having sex with the anus of another man rather then the way that it’s supposed to be done.

I know it’s mean…but I can’t help it. This person obviously thinks she is funny/sexy/appealing to someone. However, in all actuality she is one of the main cures for rape.

Sweetheart…whoever you are…if you ever see this, just NEVER take pictures again. I would be fine with that. Also, you may want to lay off “insert everything you eat here”.